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syncope at 01:40pm on 20/04/2009
syncope at 01:40pm on 20/04/2009This weekend my computer decided to commit its final act of rebellion and refuses to boot windows. I took this as a sign that I should walk away and refuse to engage--that is, give my computer the silent treatment as if it was a person (I am the master of the silent treatment, never attempt to out silent treatment me, you will perish in a well of despair). I have a suspicion this tactic might not be as successful as emotionally blackmailing a fellow human being, but internet vacations are often quite nice. Sadly, I was forced to watch The Tudors as part of this holiday, but I also got to go to the symphony (and am going again this weekend!).
Because I am bosom companions with this person known asmissyjack, I was welcomed back to the internet with an email about the Down Under Con and how lovely and delightful one Misha Collins is in RL. While I normally avoid all vids and interviews as they cause me to quake with horror, I just watched the video of Jared and Misha on Aussie brekky tv and managed to lol with only one moment of quivering. Jared is much much better looking than Sam. What's the deal on this? Isn't television supposed to hot him up? They manage to scrub off all of his hotness when they run him through make up. I was kind of surprised by that. Maybe his appeal is the fear that at any moment he's going to turn the pranks on you, his aura of FOR THE LULZ that's both shiny and problematic. Yes, basically, I'm making a 4chan analogy.
So, that little anecdote about the spn production staff not even releasing authentic scripts to dudes auditioning for roles should tell you something: they know how crazy you are! Also, that's a good policy. Someone on that team is up to speed on the realities of the current atmosphere.
On a totally different subject, yesterday I was talking to a friend about ART and being CREATIVE and other self indulgent topics I normally never discuss with anyone but this person. I only talk to her about this because I function as a kind of second therapist for her in these kinds of matters. I have a rather strange outlook on discussions of creativity and the method or the process--I don't think that anyone can be illuminated by someone else's process because each one is unique and intrinsic. I can't explain to you how I come up with the garbage I do because I have no idea how it happens. Sometimes I have dreams (this is what my friend and I were talking about, she had a dream she is writing a song about), sometimes I see something on the counter that makes me go "OH!", sometimes I have a wild hair, sometimes entire passages of dialogue come into my head fully formed like a reheatable meal in a plastic container you buy at the deli. It's all very random, and I think there's a reason for that--our brains form patterns and make connections that have nothing to do with the world in itself, it's a function of how we evolved. I don't find the artistic process special or something mystical, it's just pattern recognition like how humans see faces on sides of hills or on Mars. We do this because we can't not. (I'm very non-spiritual and don't believe in the supernatural or paranormal, no ghosts or gods or spirits, which I think surprises people--and I don't think that's just because of the subject matter that I write about. Also, don't get me started on astrology which I think is absolutely delusional and gets on my nerves in a major way.)
Anyway, this friend of mine has very similar (ok, exactly the same) feelings about these sorts of things and we feel very free to discuss our work without having to explain ourselves. I find that a lack of belief in supernatural mumbo-jumbo is considered very unacceptable in artistic communities. There's a sort of feeling that people should be "open to anything." Does that include putting a tack in my eye or drink lye? I don't see how self-delusion is "artistic," frankly. Maybe in the Romantic Victorian sense of chasing after phantasms. So far my lack of belief in literal fairies hasn't harshed my ability to make things up. I've often found the concept of an "open mind" linked to concepts of creativity, but I can also divorce what goes on in my head from what happens in the world--I can discuss a dream without feeling there's some kind of mystical element to dreaming--that doesn't mean the dream isn't itself fascinating or that the dream might have something transformative to say in my work. These opinions are highly relevant to my feelings about RPF and people needing to draw lines in their mind between their fantasy life and the reality the rest of us function in.
I seem to be in a bit of a mood. I think my friend's problems really affected me since we're so very much alike and I empathize with her plight more than I would anyone else. (She lost her day job because she needed to do something art-related, she made that choice, and sometimes it gets me down that I think that people forget there's a lot of sacrifice that goes into making your artistic life your WHOLE life.)
Because I am bosom companions with this person known as
missyjack, I was welcomed back to the internet with an email about the Down Under Con and how lovely and delightful one Misha Collins is in RL. While I normally avoid all vids and interviews as they cause me to quake with horror, I just watched the video of Jared and Misha on Aussie brekky tv and managed to lol with only one moment of quivering. Jared is much much better looking than Sam. What's the deal on this? Isn't television supposed to hot him up? They manage to scrub off all of his hotness when they run him through make up. I was kind of surprised by that. Maybe his appeal is the fear that at any moment he's going to turn the pranks on you, his aura of FOR THE LULZ that's both shiny and problematic. Yes, basically, I'm making a 4chan analogy.So, that little anecdote about the spn production staff not even releasing authentic scripts to dudes auditioning for roles should tell you something: they know how crazy you are! Also, that's a good policy. Someone on that team is up to speed on the realities of the current atmosphere.
On a totally different subject, yesterday I was talking to a friend about ART and being CREATIVE and other self indulgent topics I normally never discuss with anyone but this person. I only talk to her about this because I function as a kind of second therapist for her in these kinds of matters. I have a rather strange outlook on discussions of creativity and the method or the process--I don't think that anyone can be illuminated by someone else's process because each one is unique and intrinsic. I can't explain to you how I come up with the garbage I do because I have no idea how it happens. Sometimes I have dreams (this is what my friend and I were talking about, she had a dream she is writing a song about), sometimes I see something on the counter that makes me go "OH!", sometimes I have a wild hair, sometimes entire passages of dialogue come into my head fully formed like a reheatable meal in a plastic container you buy at the deli. It's all very random, and I think there's a reason for that--our brains form patterns and make connections that have nothing to do with the world in itself, it's a function of how we evolved. I don't find the artistic process special or something mystical, it's just pattern recognition like how humans see faces on sides of hills or on Mars. We do this because we can't not. (I'm very non-spiritual and don't believe in the supernatural or paranormal, no ghosts or gods or spirits, which I think surprises people--and I don't think that's just because of the subject matter that I write about. Also, don't get me started on astrology which I think is absolutely delusional and gets on my nerves in a major way.)
Anyway, this friend of mine has very similar (ok, exactly the same) feelings about these sorts of things and we feel very free to discuss our work without having to explain ourselves. I find that a lack of belief in supernatural mumbo-jumbo is considered very unacceptable in artistic communities. There's a sort of feeling that people should be "open to anything." Does that include putting a tack in my eye or drink lye? I don't see how self-delusion is "artistic," frankly. Maybe in the Romantic Victorian sense of chasing after phantasms. So far my lack of belief in literal fairies hasn't harshed my ability to make things up. I've often found the concept of an "open mind" linked to concepts of creativity, but I can also divorce what goes on in my head from what happens in the world--I can discuss a dream without feeling there's some kind of mystical element to dreaming--that doesn't mean the dream isn't itself fascinating or that the dream might have something transformative to say in my work. These opinions are highly relevant to my feelings about RPF and people needing to draw lines in their mind between their fantasy life and the reality the rest of us function in.
I seem to be in a bit of a mood. I think my friend's problems really affected me since we're so very much alike and I empathize with her plight more than I would anyone else. (She lost her day job because she needed to do something art-related, she made that choice, and sometimes it gets me down that I think that people forget there's a lot of sacrifice that goes into making your artistic life your WHOLE life.)
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