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syncope at 01:55pm on 19/02/2009
syncope at 01:55pm on 19/02/2009I'm not having the best day. So I thought I'd take the dogs out into the snow shower for a walk, as you do. I put my iPod on shuffle, something I haven't done in a while. I'm not really listening to music right now (which should tell you all you need to know about where my head is), but I thought "fuck it!" and stuck it in my pocket. It's about 28F here right now and windy, the sun shiny through blowing, intermittent snow. The right kind of weather for my mood. My iPod decided to make fun of me and played a song off Folie A Deux--which I actually LISTENED TO--followed by Ryan Adams. This was my iPod trying to share a joke with me. The FAD song was "She's My Winona" and the RAdams was "Voices." Talk about a couple of crackpots.
I think with most artists (term used liberally), there is a charitable way to read them and an uncharitable. The charitable way involves listening to their commentary and trying to commiserate with it and share in the struggle the art expresses. This is the general point of art after all--sharing a universal experience that some people can express in an abstract or removed way. The uncharitable way to read an artist is to see them as drama llama whining children. I have jumped to phase two on both Pete and Ryan, I believe. I listen to the lyrics on FAD and what I hear is someone who is struggling to remain relevant when they're all too aware they no longer are. He says this directly in the lyrics (he's not known for subtlety). I suppose that perhaps him realizing he's the emperor's tailor is what has lead me to disregarding the new record so completely. I don't find that compelling, whereas his emo "I hate you now!" rage and depression from the earlier records I find to be a universal experience that will be perennially relevant (and appeals to me, because I was also once 15). With Ryan I think my dissatifaction is cyclical, depending on where he is in his own headspace when he's making a record. Some parts of his manic-depressive cycle appeal to me more than others. There is a there there with him, something real underneath the "woe is me!" that I don't find to be the case with Pete any longer (I think there once was something real there, but he's become a self-parody, both in his music and his life).
I've been giving the artistic temperament some serious thought lately as part of the process of realizing that's my own critical flaw (that I, sadly, possess one). I wonder how much self-awareness impacts the kind of product a person creates. Pete seems aware that he's a drama whoring nutbag. Ryan seems to think he's just a special snowflake but NOT that he's actually pretty typical of his sort. I wonder if self-awareness actually puts too much of an ironic filter on what you create. Who's to say? It's one of those in situ issues that unresolvable.
I wonder if Ryan would kill himself if he saw me seriously comparing him to Pete Wentz--ok, even I had to laugh at that.
I think with most artists (term used liberally), there is a charitable way to read them and an uncharitable. The charitable way involves listening to their commentary and trying to commiserate with it and share in the struggle the art expresses. This is the general point of art after all--sharing a universal experience that some people can express in an abstract or removed way. The uncharitable way to read an artist is to see them as drama llama whining children. I have jumped to phase two on both Pete and Ryan, I believe. I listen to the lyrics on FAD and what I hear is someone who is struggling to remain relevant when they're all too aware they no longer are. He says this directly in the lyrics (he's not known for subtlety). I suppose that perhaps him realizing he's the emperor's tailor is what has lead me to disregarding the new record so completely. I don't find that compelling, whereas his emo "I hate you now!" rage and depression from the earlier records I find to be a universal experience that will be perennially relevant (and appeals to me, because I was also once 15). With Ryan I think my dissatifaction is cyclical, depending on where he is in his own headspace when he's making a record. Some parts of his manic-depressive cycle appeal to me more than others. There is a there there with him, something real underneath the "woe is me!" that I don't find to be the case with Pete any longer (I think there once was something real there, but he's become a self-parody, both in his music and his life).
I've been giving the artistic temperament some serious thought lately as part of the process of realizing that's my own critical flaw (that I, sadly, possess one). I wonder how much self-awareness impacts the kind of product a person creates. Pete seems aware that he's a drama whoring nutbag. Ryan seems to think he's just a special snowflake but NOT that he's actually pretty typical of his sort. I wonder if self-awareness actually puts too much of an ironic filter on what you create. Who's to say? It's one of those in situ issues that unresolvable.
I wonder if Ryan would kill himself if he saw me seriously comparing him to Pete Wentz--ok, even I had to laugh at that.
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