hello, everyone, did you miss me when I was away?

This fake open letter is pretty awesome. For the most part I think sports celebrities are boring, I don't blame them because I don't think they have time to do anything interesting since all they get to do is workout and train, so whatever. Micheal Phelps is that rare character that I find amusing every time I see him flapping his yap. He is consistently real, amusing, and as normal as possible under the circumstances. And the pot smoking brouhaha just makes me like him more. Smoke your pot, Mike, whatevs. I can't wait for the baby boomers to get too senile to pay attention to current events!

So when the whole Phelps thing first dropped I was talking to AN OLD PERSON about it and I said "why the hell do you care? He won those stupid medals already, so what's the difference?" and this old person replied "Because he's a role model." To which I replied "And?"

What I actually think is that people aren't worried about The Children so much as they're scandalized all for themselves. We can thank that vestigial puritanical streak that also contributes to people being wide-eyed and disturbed by transgendered people and the gays for this anti-drug attitude (I continue to believe that people only care about trans people and the gays because they can't help imagining the sex acts people with these labels get up to and they're equal measure titillated and disturbed by these imaginings). I think also involved here is the element of not wanting people to enjoy themselves in a way that the scandalized person doesn't. Yes, I'm saying people who care about Michael Phelps smoking pot need to get stoned and have gay sex and the world would be a better place (keep in mind I do not even like pot, but I will smoke a bowl with someone for the sake of world harmony if I have to, but I draw the line at then discussing the finer points of Hanna Barbera cartoons).

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This is something I typed in a comment window for stoney when she asked for stories.

( I will tell you a story: )

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I think I might be ready to write again, which I was starting to doubt would happen any time soon, to be honest (I also realized that the number of things I've started and shelved since the beginning of the year are FIVE, that's probably a record for unfinished projects for me--I simply never do that). I also can't believe I talked about an Olympic athlete on my lj. I am one of like five people in the WHOLE WORLD who hates the Olympics. The jingoism and waste of resources for lame-ass political posturing really gets under my skin. I also don't understand what's interesting about watching people in a pool or leaping over hurdles. I know some people must derive pleasure from watching that, and I do not begrudge anyone else their fun, but I'd rather read crappy articles in one of the 80 crappy magazines I subscribe to or check my text messages or something.

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In other news, completely unawares of recent happenings around here, Nate just emailed me to tel me Cory Doctorow is going nuts about climate change on boingboing. I don't think I read boingboing anymore, even for a climate change flame war.

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"We had a daughter together, it's a tragedy, Crystal, that it took her death to bring us closer together." <-----random piece of dialogue I just overheard on a soap someone else in the house turned on.

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Also, I asked Kita if she wanted me to write her something for her birthday (we share one) only to learn that she's WRITING BANDOM FIC and apparently mostly ONLY READING BANDOM FIC and I thought that everyone would want to know that with capslock. For the people who will care about this: the fic she is writing is VAMPIRE-themed BANDOM FIC and I can vouch for the quality of her writing. I know there are at least five people reading this who will be interested in this news. If you want to preemptively friend her, it's kita0610.

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ETA: This work of genius: In the beginning, there was wank.